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Handling What Happens


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In high school and college, I played in a rock and roll band. The first band started in my friend Paul Moxness’s basement with a couple of guys and some ambitious dreams. As I remember, it wasn’t the music that was the high point. It was the homemade pizza his mother would bring downstairs at the point where our music became overwhelming upstairs. Our fame grew almost to the end of the block and was highlighted by a performance at a community entertainment event and a short-lived gig in the old post office. In undergraduate school, the group had morphed into a keyboard, a couple of guitars, a drum, and a bass guitar player who actually knew some songs. We played in small roadside clubs, or as they were called, tavern dance halls. Through no fault of our own, we became the house band at the old train station, still named the Union Station, just off campus. We picked up some high school homecoming dances and the occasional guest appearance with other bands.


The experience, to say the least, was a surreal spectacle of aimless wandering through a time in life that taught lessons on what to do when everything goes wrong. One of the guys had an old panel van that, at one time, had a good life but had become disoriented and ready for a good home. It was ceremonially packed with equipment, instruments, and a group of guys barely fitting into the spare cracks. At any one time, we were dealing with half a dozen problems, from pooling our money to buy gas, equipment that needed repair or adjustment, and a box full of electric cords reminiscent of the Indiana Jones Lost Ark snake pit. What I took from the experience was a phrase in my mother’s playbook. It’s not what happens; it is how you handle what happens that makes you who you are.


Life is full of one thing after another. Throughout our lives, we face a variety of events and situations. Some come with ease, while others pose unexpected challenges. As we navigate through these experiences, we are constantly presented with choices at various levels. Some of these choices are ours to make, while others are beyond our control. A fundamental principle governs our decision-making process: always striving to do our best.


We must gather as much knowledge and information as possible to make informed decisions. This may involve conducting research, seeking expert advice, or simply taking the time to reflect on the situation. Once we have made a decision, we must be prepared to accept the consequences that come with it. Whether the outcome is positive or negative, we must take responsibility for our actions and avoid making excuses or blaming others for the results. Instead, we should embrace the lessons we learn from our experiences and use them to shape our future decisions and actions.


In essence, life is a journey filled with opportunities for growth and development. Each decision, whether big or small, shapes our path and helps us become the person we aspire to be. By embracing this journey with an open mind and a willingness to learn, we can navigate life's challenges with grace and resilience.




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